The Perfect Music Mix

I'm making a CD for a friend. I've never done this before, in all my years being a music lover and receiving mix tapes from people. i've never made one for another.

I started by gathering some of my favorite songs, the ones that meant the most, that moved me the most. After bringing them together I realized so many of them were about God. It was a funny realization for me, I mean i love God, I'm a religious woman, but I had never realized how the songs that sound to me like they could be about God.

And so now an odd predicament. Do I give someone a mix CD of my quasi religious music? In the face of the cultural reality that no one in their right mind listens to religious music in Canada? And to be honest, this is for a friend, that I feel "more then friend" feelings for. So hence the trepidation.

Another trepidation...songs that aren't about God. Are about love...so I worry which songs will be read into. What will he think if he hears this song? that its my personal letter to him? Maybe thats not a bad thing.

IN the end fuck it, i figure, thems are the facts. these are the songs I like and these are the songs he gets.

Some of the selections include Aretha Franklin, Squeeze, The Streets, and Patti Griffin. Really, only the best and I'm even obsessing about lineup and how to arrange the songs so they flow and it all makes sense and hopefully moves my listener.

Imaginary Boyfriends

yesterday I went for my psychological tune up, i saw my lovely therapist. we are working through some trust issues due to the weirdness of how my previous relationship went.

Anyway,

so she asked me to imagine my current crush was there in the room...i did this and laughed.

here we are, not even dating, and we were having couples counseling

and i was just so touched that he'd even come.

on hating my job

i have not been happy with my job for the last while but lately with new changes and people leaving my dislike for the job is turning into hatred. and its sad there are lots of good things, my coworkers, the fact i can wear what i want, its a nice office, i have a nice computer. but the lack of leadership, the stress, my new boss, the fact that i dont want to work at all...just kinda nibbles on my passion and eats away at my heart.

i know what i should be doing but financially i'm scared. and i know worrying about money and feeling stressed about pursuing my passion and "making it" can be just as depression. for now i think i just need to plan my way out. and save my way out. and watch tv shows on the internet for free while i'm meant to be working.

sadly though, boredom at work can lead to boredom everywhere else and you start looking for entertainment and drama in all the wrong places. arg, i'll just have to find my way through this.